This has been a week of kitchen failures.
Utterly sad, depressing, and very not tasty kitchen failures.
First, there was a recipe from Bon Appetit. Ziti with Skillet-Roasted Root Vegetables. It sounded so delicious, and the picture looked amazing. And while I'd never had a golden beet or a parsnip before, the recipe was from Bon Appetit! It had to be good, right?
I hunted down all the fresh root vegetables in the produce section while Steven watched, shaking his head silently as I grabbed one unusual selection after another. I turned them over contemplatively in my hands at the grocery store a while before placing them lovingly in my cart, thinking to myself, "Yeah. I can totally do this."
(Famous last words.)
I diligently chopped up the vegetables, which made for a colorful array.
I set aside the beet greens for later (I'd never had beet greens either. This will factor in later, as you can probably imagine.)
I cooked the pasta (I had penne, not ziti.)
As I watched the vegetables saute, I had many grand plans for this meal. It would be our new wintry, substantial-yet-healthy go-to dinner dish.
I chopped up the beet greens, and dreamed of making this dish with beet greens from my own garden someday...
And then ... something happened.
The veggies weren't browning like I'd imagined they would. Instead, they were just sort of getting... mushy.
Unwavering and stubborn as ever, I soldiered on, reading and re-reading the directions a thousand times. Yes, saute until browned and then cover and cook until tender.
Alright -- just get it in a dish and onto the pasta -- maybe it will still taste good.
Right? Looks okay....
Taste: Negative 700 Billion.
It was SO. EXTREMELY. GROSS.
Beets? Seriously? What was I thinking??
Steven and I each suffered through a small serving, and then I threw it all out and we went to Subway.
Not one to be easily deterred, I decided that tonight's meal was going to redeem my kitchen woes. Beef Stroganoff in the crock pot. How could I possibly screw that up?
And yet, somehow I managed. At 8:05 this morning before I left for court, I was throwing ingredients into the crock pot as fast as possible: stew beef, chopped onion, cream of mushroom soup, pepper, cream cheese, and sour cream. I put the lid on the crock pot and glanced back at the recipe one last time before I left the house.
"Just before serving, stir in sour cream and cream cheese."
When I got home, I learned why the recipe does not call for cream cheese and sour cream to be cooked for ten hours straight. Again, like a broken record, it was SO. EXTREMELY. GROSS.
(Steven, being the kindhearted and loving husband that he is, still asked for seconds. I promised him I'd make it right next time. I also promised him that we'd go back to the basics. Tomorrow night? Macaroni-and-cheese. Wish me luck.)